I'm sorry but I'm not in the right place for a relationship right now. A couple weeks ago I got arrested for rape. Don't worry I wasn't convicted, but then again I wasn't really innocent either. A lot of people have trouble with laughing in the wrong situations... I wish I had that problem. Instead I get erections in the wrong situations. That is why I can't take you out to Chuck E. Cheese. That sucks cause I have a lot of store credit there and they ripped me off cause I got drunk and went on stage with the mechanical band with my boner.
I wish that I could take you out. I'm aware that you're into me. You are very appealing cause you made it easy for me to approach you. It is very hard to approach women, because it's hard to figure out which car is theirs in the Pizza Hut parking lot.
Thank you though ; )
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